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From the day the best man is informed of his pending obligations at the groom’s upcoming wedding, one of the main things on his mind is the speech he’ll need to deliver come wedding day. Public speaking is often worrisome to the best of us, and perhaps even more so when conducted in front of those we know. The fear of making an infamously bad speech that will live on in the jokes of friends and family for years to come is ever present. Thankfully, the best man has plenty of other duties to occupy his mind as the wedding approaches. We explain these duties in detail below. As for the speech, don’t worry; visit our speeches section for help with that as well.
6 months
Help with the selection of the ushers and lay out their duties for them
Get together with the bride, groom, and chief bridesmaid/matron of honour, to discuss wedding plans
4 months
Begin writing your reception speech and practice delivering it, especially if you’ll be doing so from memory
Plan for the stag party
Travel with the bride and groom to the various venues to confirm timing, parking arrangements, etc.
Gather a list of those guests who will receive special seating arrangements during the ceremonies and relay that information to the ushers
1 week before
Ensure the groom has all his documents and paperwork in order for both the ceremony and the honeymoon, such as passports and visas
Ready transportation to the ceremony for yourself and the groom
Get transportation to and from the reception lined up
If necessary, arrange to have a going away car ready for the bride and groom after the reception
Use whatever resource you can to check for any diversions, roadwork, other events taking place on wedding day that could impact the route taken to the wedding or the amount of time needed to travel to sites
Take part in the wedding rehearsal
Take notes on the availability and details of any emergency taxi companies in the area
Put the finishing touches on your speech
Get your hair cut
The day before
Ready the decorations for the going away car
Collect any hired items, such as clothing and accessories
Wash your car if driving to the ceremony
On the day
Make final arrangements regarding the ushers, buttonholes, and the order of service sheets
Gather all correspondence that will be read at the reception, such as e-mails, cards, and telephone messages
Keep the rings safely tucked away until the vows
Help the groom prepare for his big day on time
Make sure the groom gets to the church a good 20 minutes in advance of the planned start to the ceremony
At the church
Check up on the ushers
Sit with the groom on the right side front pew
If required, witness the signing of the register
Ensure the church and registrar are paid the appropriate fees
Act as escort out of the church for the chief bridesmaid/matron of honour
Help the photographer with the organization of guests for the photographs
Make sure no one is left without transportation to the reception
At the reception
Greet guests in the receiving line
If there is no Master of Ceremonies or Toastmaster, announce the speeches and cake cutting
Read any messages from the cards, e-mails, and telephone messages
Deliver your speech and make replies on behalf of the bridesmaids
Take a turn on the dance floor with the chief bridesmaid after the bride and groom have completed their first dance
Spruce up the going away car with decorations
Load all the necessary luggage into the going away car
Ensure the bride and groom are changed and ready to announce their departure on time
Take possession of the groom’s wedding clothes if necessary
After the wedding
Safely store the wedding presents
Take charge of returning any hired clothing and accessories
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